Life being normal

2 years ago i did school hung out with friend when ever my life was awesome. now i do school see my friends once a month and now i wish i was 15 and it was normal. everything has change, i have to plan around my sister going out and partying or her work. i just cant txt one of my friends and say hey do you want to see a movie. i always just want to be out i want to not be here when she is here. i just want to lift all the time. that is not normal. last year i asked for a punching bag to get stress out on. it is so stupid that i am this young and i have to go though this. i don't like it at all. i cant believe that last year on new years eve i had the love of my life and now he sometimes talks to me. he is the one who made me smile all the time i never got mad and when i did he turned that frown up side up. he was always wanting to see me just to say hi. but now i am a teenager and i have so many things i am going though and i don't have a person in my life to talk to and let him take me to this world far away just taking to me that is what i love the most about him. ahhhh that is what i loved about 2009. i hope everyone's week is going well and i hope its a safe one <3